fast or far

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“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go with others.” 
― African Proverb

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first a long pause, as I think about that.

If you want to go fast, go alone.  

If you want to go far, go with others.  

I've always been on the side of going fast, mostly alone.  Not really by choice, at least I don't think it was.  I didn't deliberately decide to go it alone, I guess it just felt easier somehow, not to drag anyone along with me.  At least until I met my husband.  :) 

Makes me think of another quote...  "'let go, or be dragged" - zen proverb

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so.  I guess if you are going to go far, with others, you shouldn't drag or let anyone drag you along?   This reminds me of when I was about 7 years old and taking my swimming test to pass to the next level.  The test was to tread water in the deep end of the pool for five minutes.  Two students went at the same time.  It was me and another girl, I don't remember her name, I just remember that she didn't tread water, she clung to me, while I tread water for both of us.  I was too shy to do or say anything, so I just fought to keep us both above water.  This seems to be a recurring lesson in my life.  

If you want to go far, go with others. 

Others.   Exactly how many is others?  

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Growing up as an only child with young parents it was just us.  Rarely were there others. I had my family and a handful of close friends, but less was always more to me when it came to "others".   Now,  as India prepares to leave for college and Kevin and Jade decide on what project they are going to work on, and my teaching events are few and far between, I wonder, where are the others?   

They are there. I know this.  They've always been there, I've just been quietly keeping busy, not in vain, but in an honest attempt to be present in the life I am in.  There are only so many hours in the day and many of mine are spent taking care of someone or something.  But I can feel the change coming, the time when I am going to need others to go any further is approaching. 

 It's knowing this that makes me feel like there's a piece of tracing paper protecting my heart. 

I suppose it's time for me to figure my life out again.  That's what I have been thinking about. 

In my ongoing, never-ending mission to downsize our stuff I was going through more "stuff" and found a faded newspaper clipping from when I graduated high school, the obligatory senior picture and a brief statement summarizing what I planned on doing with the rest of my life.  An art major with, a minor in environmental science.  oh yeah, I forgot about that part of me.  What happened to that part of me?  The me that made Greenpeace posters when I was in jr. high and put as many as I could afford to print all over my little town.  The me that spent hours climbing trees and exploring the acres of woods behind my house.  The me that loved being in nature almost as much as making art.    I wonder, had I studied environmental science and actually finished college, where/who would I be?   Probably working in an office, somewhere, dreaming about being an artist. 

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Maybe that's my problem.  One of them.  Always dreaming about what I am not.   When I was a potter,  I wanted to be a painter.  Now a painter I want to be a potter again.   It's not really a problem, more of an internal restlessness.  And it's not like I can't be both.  Due to age, I've given up my dreams of being a professional dancer but still think about going to culinary school or studying under a master potter in Japan. I think of the artist, writer, and potter, Beatrice Wood, living to be 105 years with the last 25 years of her life being the most productive.  

"Do be true to yourself, whether it's bad doesn't matter. The important thing - you have to copy while you're studying. And culture is - each of us - is like one pearl added to another to make a chain. We each contribute to the other. And that's all right. But once you're on your own, do that which comes from within. And I feel this very strongly."   -Beatrice Wood


 

 

so let me summarize...

If you want to go fast, go alone.  it will be easier, but lonely. 

If you want to go far, go with others, but don't' drag or be dragged. 

Always be authentic and do what comes from within...

and keep dreaming.  always!  

Over the summer Kevin and Jade finished my clay studio!  Look at this transformation!  Pretty amazing!  It even has air conditioning, something our house does not have.  I am loving it so much and cannot wait to spend more time working there.  

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How lovely are these croissants that my son made from scratch?  By far the best I've ever had!  All 24 were gone in less than a day.   I love that he loves to bake, who knows, maybe he'll go to culinary school and be a famous chef. a mama can dream.  ;)    The dishes are all ones I made and the matcha is my favorite.  You can get it here.  

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Misty MawnComment